My 10 Most Insulting Comments of All Time, TA DA!

Somebody told me they wondered if people really understood my sense of humor through the internet. Well- I think some of these comments are hilarious even though they are not flattering. For the record, as I looked through comments to find these again, I realized how overwhelmingly positive the vast majority are- so thank you very much to all of you who are so kind. I appreciate it. Hope you can enjoy (just a little) a laugh at my expense.

In no particular order....The top 10!
(Note- I introduce each quote FIRST, then the actual comment is below.)

This goes to the person who pointed out that smoking marijuana while pregnant is akin to having a piece of bread. I just had some carrot cake.....or did I smoke crack? Does it really matter? No, of course not, they are about the same. There were lots of angry people about this post, all of whom were named anonymous, the meaner ones were deleted.

"Every single thing ingested produces changes in body chemistry and function, so pointing out marijuana use as a drug is misleading. Bread is a drug by the same token. So are Brazil nuts. But we don't fear monger by telling women that eating a slice of bread will cause an insulin reaction and create a gut bacteria imbalance that will impair mood and mental acuity. We don't warn against increasing testosterone via eating Brazil nuts as something that might not be optimal for growing fetuses... " Original post here.

Though I admit that my critique of the "Breaking Dawn" birth scene may have been not my best work, I must believe there is stupider stuff out there on the internet.....right?!


"This is probably the most stupid thing I have ever read... ITS FICTIONAL... LOL Who gives a crap how a fake baby was born in a story. And having read the books I dont see how you think 'the baby' could have been 'born' any other way. SO silly. Sorry lol" Original post here.

Goes to the person who believed I hate my kids because I made a joke. Yikes. Actually, I only spawned so I could start a natural birth blog....(And I don't own a Prada anything!! Nor am I a perfectionist!!! As if!)


"Sounds to me, like you only spawned in order to have more reasons to complain. I hope you can someday find joy in making a finger paint mess on the kitchen table, or destroying a new pair of Prada loafers by jumping in mud puddles with your kiddos.. Those memories will not send your children to therapy, like your anal retentive attention to perfection will. God be with your children & your Husband!" You can read the original post here

This one goes to the people who believe that when I write a post I am purposely insulting them. For the record- I have never met you. I am not making fun of you. The fact that I talk about natural birth like it is great does NOT mean that I think you suck. And yes, I realize that women die in childbirth. I am sincerely sorry when birth goes wrong for women, that is why I do this.

"Are you kidding me? Women very, VERY frequently died in childbirth up through the 1950s...which is coincidentally around the time when c-sections started to be more frequently used. There are numerous heart problems that go undetected until the body undergoes a traumatic process like natural delivery. Not all women gestate "beautifully" and not all pelvises are mobile. Some, like mine, have been broken in several places and will never expand the way you describe, making a c-section the only way giving birth would ever be possible. This post is DISGUSTINGLY ableist and woefully unresearched. Yes, many women can give birth naturally. But many more children and mothers survive now that there are alternative ways of getting a baby out of its mother's body. Many more babies are born without brain damage from cord injuries now that we are able to monitor fetal activity. The end objective is to deliver a healthy baby and stay alive to care for it. Modern advances have made that much more possible for many, many families." You can read the original post here

I just call this "Mercedes man" and I have to say, insulting my children is an interesting tactic!

"Thank you for sharing your opinion! Opinions, however, are much like anuses. Everyone has one, everyone else's stinks.
50% of the population has an IQ below 100 and I commend you on your courage to be one of that 50% and step forward with such an astonishingly uneducated and selfish point of view. To be so blatantly wrong and yet share your misguided opinions as fact illustrates that what you lack in intelligence you make up for in conviction.
I hope that you beat the genetic odds and breed a child with enough intelligence to survive, and thrive, despite their mother's feeble mental state. I'm concerned, however, that your offspring will languish. If you don't believe in advances in medicine you probably also don't believe in other advances, such as electricity, computers, the fact that the earth is round, etc. Odds are your child, if they survive despite your negligence, will end up an outcast and a reject. On the plus side, SOMEONE'S got to pump gas into my Mercedes." You can read the original post here

So this post quoted package inserts from common labor drugs. Needless to say, it didn't sit well with everybody. Why are they mad at me and not big pharm?! But, I probably should try to get over myself. That-- that is true.

"I hate articles like this, written in a tone that mocks anyone who doesn't go along with your perfect ideals of what childbirth should be. Those are POSSIBLE side effects; it does not mean that they will happen. There are also POSSIBLE risks to drug-free, at home births.

Post traumatic stress? Really? Lol. You shouldn't tell people what they should or shouldn't do during their own labor! Or try to scare them by telling them they will suffer for years if they use drugs! Get over yourself. " You can read it, here

My most popular post of all time was about having more than one child, which of course was insulting to people with only one child. In all honesty, I did not mean it that way! I used to have just one! Really I did!

""When you have more than one child you start to learn a few things"

Guess what? I learned those things early on with my first and only child. Your post assumes that all first babies/children are easy as pie. For many moms they're not. Especially when you're dealing with an extremely high needs baby. You really shouldn't put all first babies, or any other baby/child for that matter, in a cookie cutter mold. All babies are unique and some are hardier to handle than others.

Your posts really discredits good mothers who struggle with that first difficult child and have to hear comments like, "You only have one child. How hard can it be?" " The original post is here.

Edited for your reading pleasure. And, in case you were wondering, GET OFF YOUR BACK!

"This is bulls@#t. You do not know why a woman laid on her back to have her baby! So stop with this bullshit! Babies are SAVED with the fetal monitor! Babies are SAVED when their own mother is laying on their backs delivering them!!!!" You can read more, here

OK, I actually deleted this one it was so offensive. But I will say that it had to do with this circumcision post and it was left by a man who claimed to be in his 70's. I will just say that if you want your comment to make the cut, don't include the words masturbation and thrusting in the same sentence. I don't want to know.

Comment #2-
Too offensive to repeat.

Short, sweet, profound. I admit to deleting it, it kind of hurt my feelings. This about sums it up. ( It was from the marijuana post.)

"You're dumb."

That is all folks!


Kristyn said…
Ugh! Ya know, sometimes I wonder if certain people never learned "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." I mean, it's ok to have an opinion. I actually disagree with some of the things you say. Gasp! Zounds! But you don't hear me getting my panties all in a bunch. But I guess you just gotta laugh at some of these people. I mean, they accuse you of spouting misinformation, but I don't see THEM citing any factual references! People need to stop taking stuff so personally. ESPECIALLY when it CLEARLY wasn't personally aimed at them! And that's my two cents :)
Unknown said…
I actually found those statements they posted as "funny" not ha ha ha funny, but as in I'm laughing at their stupidity while trying to convince themselves they are right and you are wrong. You post your opinions, ideas, and what you have learned, nothing is a cookie cutter mold. Every situation is different and needs to be treated differently, but I honestly think that most people put too much of their health and lifestyle into what the "professionals" say, instead of taking responsibility for their own lives.

So yes, I'm laughing at THEM for what they are trying to state as an insult to you, but actually only show their stupidity.
Unknown said…
Thanks for having the courage to take a stand and post the articles that you do! Keep it up. Please. :)
homebound mama said…
i will be the first to admit that i don't agree or follow all of your beliefs on here. in fact i had both of my children csection with no regrets about it, both were still wonderful birth experiences. but i also respect the women that go through it naturally. i follow your page because it is a different point of view and i find it interesting and educational. why do these people follow the blog if they are so set against what you say? its almost like they do it just to have something to argue with which is just sad. and i agree with kayla that it takes a courageous person to receive critisisms like that and continue to do what you do with such passion.
For the record, I actually do agree with every single thing you say. :) -- Banned From Baby Showers
Teri said…
I started reading your blog in the past week and have spent A LOT of time on here since. While I don't agree 100% on every little thing that you say and post about, I think it's obvious that you are a TALENTED, INTELLIGENT, WELL-RESEARCHED, CARING, and PASSIONATE woman. I love your blog. I love every controversial topic you post on and am so thankful for your thoughts. Your passion for educating the ignorant women (and men) in this country about all things natural when it comes to birth is refreshing and a blessing. And you are fully entitled to write about your opinions just like all the angry commenters are entitled to theirs. Only you have a couple thousand followers that like reading your opinions and the negative commenters..not so much. YOU ROCK! Keep up the good work!! We appreciate you!
Melissa said…
This made me smile and feel better about some of the nasty comments I've been getting over at my blog. My anonymous blog was recently outed, so I have a feeling that I am related to my trolls.
Krista Eger said…
I must say that my favorite parts are when people claim you're uneducated when it is so very clear who the real uneducated person is!
Alisha Stamper said…
Lame. I'm sad for people who are so in denial. You can't even begin to shed light for them because they don't even speak any sort of sane, self-educating language. The one about women dying in childbirth made me think about the book The Politics of Breastfeeding. Have you read that? I appreciate that you embrace your sphere of influence and that you take this blessing of bearing children seriously. I do, too. From one smart mama to another, I applaud you.
MandaRoo said…
I'm habitually on the fence about all of this. An all natural birth wasn't my cup of tea but then after the birth of my son (induction for being Failure to Thrive, then c-section) I've started doing my research. Why are these people even reading this blog if it offends them so much??

I love the birth stories you post, and sometimes the articles about what is and isn't necessary! I do usually go and look up points you've made. I think that's a good way to go. I don't want to be uninformed next time around. And I think blogs like this can help lots of women look into the things they need to look into.

Keep it up! You're obviously a very intelligent woman with enough life experience to back everything you say up :)
Mama Birth said…
Oh my gosh- thanks so much. Honestly some of these were not insulting- just maybe angry, and not even really at me-- and some really upset me at the time, but looking back are silly. What I noticed is how overwhelmingly KIND most people are but how the few that are not really stick out. Thanks-
Becky said…
Wow! I guess when you have a blog with controversial topics, the comments get even more out of control than typical blog comments! I love and appreciate your postings--as someone who had a natural hospital birth and is looking to a possible homebirth next time, it's great to hear all of this information:)
I think people who leave these kinds of comments are the kind that just want to hear (see?) themselves talk. Maybe they're bored and just want some attention? Yeah, my three year old does that sometimes. It's not cute.

I read often (don't comment much), and I enjoy it. It's nice to see other mamas educating themselves and helping other women do the same. : )
Aileen Mauro said…
Sorry but LMAO!!! "You're dumb" has got to be the most idiotic comment you've ever gotten. At least other commenters TRY to sound educated! They couldn't come up with anything better than "You're dumb." Freakin genius.
Hilarious! Thank you for the early morning laugh :-)
Unknown said…
And you call my posts brave. LOL I don't get half these comments. I like you and your posts. I usually agree with everything you post.
Julie said…
#6 blows my mind! People are so easily offended. Keep up the great posts!

Anonymous said…
I'm gonna have to disagree with all my peers here and say-- this was weak, Mama Birth! It's no personal offense to you, it's just that, I KNOW you get far worse than this (don't you)? If this is the worst stuff you've gotten, you're doing alright! Next time shock us with true insanity, not just the mediocre everyday BS. I know you must hear it.
Unknown said…
These made me so upset! I hope I didn't bother you with my defending comments. I just hate how ignorant the people who insult you are. They make up stuff and then cling to it. It kills me. Then others who act like you are saying every single birth should be natural even if the mom and baby die. It's just ridiculous. Then there is the fact that it's your blog and you can say what you want!! This is your place, your opinion, and people have no right being so rude to you!
Mama Birth said…
@ Your perfect birth- mmmm- I get ones that annoy me more ---"you should say this or that" but most are not that rude. I did delete a few with the dope post- it got a little out of control!
@ Carmaletta-
Don't worry about them- some people just want to start a fire! I figure that they are their own worst enemy, not me!
Unknown said…
Thank you for having the courage to stand up for the truth and highlight the risks tha many birtht interventions can have. Although it is great that these interventions are there when truly needed, they are too commonplace and many women don't get the full knowledge of what the risks really are. I am all about choice but the amount of women who are guilted into unnecessary procedures and drugs is a serious issue in our country. I appreciate your bravery and honesty, these comments listed prove that some people have some guilt issues they are looking to project onto others.
The Mom said…
I love your bravery, your spirit, and your fearlessness to say what you do and know you are going to get lip for it....and you say it anyway.

I am not brave enough to blog like you do so I just share yours. :-)

Thanks for what you write. And I'm so glad the kind hearted comments are able to encourage you and you can laugh about the ignorant ones.

Let me also echo it is quite immature to follow a blog you don't agree with just for the sake of starting an argument.
Unknown said…
I found these to be rather amusing, you should post them periodically for a little bit of healing laughter, after all, it is the best medicine! I also loved what "mercedes man" had to say, he must be a doctor. In my opinion medical advancement isn't always for the better, for example, antibiotics... They kill all bacteria in your body, your immune system uses bacteria to fight infection, if all the bacteria is killed you are just starting this endless cycle of sickly people which in turn keeps doctors employed and able to make their Mercedes payments every month! Ha ha. In my opinion, this would be an area where medical advancement was not for the better, we should have stuck with the old method of using herbs to strengthen the immune system so that it can fight the bad bacteria on it's own. I also have to say that I love your blog, I am a first time mom and am trying to have a natural hospital birth and find the birth stories very encouraging!
Unknown said…
In motivating people, you've got to engage their minds and their hearts. I motivate people, I hope, by example - and perhaps by excitement, by having productive ideas to make others feel involved.